Gone Baby Gone... but that's okay.

Hello, all. Remember me? Ya know, a few major things happen in my life and it's like I forgot how to blog. Forgive me. :)
Well, I'm sad to report that the whole pregnancy thing did not pan out. Child #5 has joined his/her siblings in heaven where (I'm told) we will someday meet. Dave and I went to the doctor for our weekly ultrasound on December 2nd and the heartbeat we had seen only 7 days prior was no longer there. The doctor did an outpatient surgery to remove the baby (or "cells" as they like to call it). It was a very sad and frustrating time, but I rest easy knowing, I repeat - KNOWING - that everything happens for a reason and our family of three feels more perfect than ever.
I wasn't able to say that before. I used to feel like there was a void I thought could only be filled by another child. And I was angry about my miscarriages. I hated the phrase "everything happens for a reason". Bologna. What possible reason could there be for three of my children dying before we even had a chance to meet them? Well, I'm so glad to say that those days of anger and frustration are behind me; replaced with a calm sense of acceptance and faith. I truly believe that God has a wonderful plan for me and my family. Understanding it is not nearly as important as enjoying it, so that's where my focus lies - on enjoying the life He has given me.